Thursday, October 1, 2015

Week 6: Storytelling "Can your fate be questioned?"



“Do you hear that? I think I hear the sounds of a heavenly oasis. I hear the soothing sounds of water that cleanse the spirits, cleanses you of impurities and makes you whole,” Nakula said to his brothers. The Pandavas started to reach their breaking point of dehydration after living in the forest for so long. After losing the bet, they were stricken to thirteen years of exile, twelve years in poverty, followed by one year of disguise. “If my eyes don’t mistake me I think that I see a stream up ahead,” said Nakula. “At last, we have found some water to cleanse out pallets,” softly whispered Yudhisthira. As Nakula started to walk towards the stream, he felt a sense of hesitation, as if a ghost was holding him back. Of course the first thing that he did was question his mental state of mind, because it had been awhile since he had some water. But Nakula knew that his mind was not playing tricks on him, something did not feel right to him about the river. Nakula speedily ran to his brothers to try and warn them of the river. As Nakula tries to explain to his brothers that it wasn’t a good idea to go towards the water, it backfired on him. Nakula was not aware of how dehydrated he was until his words got all jumbled up, which made it incoherently possible to understand what Nakula was trying to say. “Brother, have you gone mad? You are just confused and you aren’t aware of what is coming out of your mouth,” said Bhima. But Nakula grabbed his brother’s arm and looked him in the eyes. Bhima knew that something was wrong, just by the scared look on Nakula’s face. Bhima had never seen this look in his brother’s eyes, not even when they would fight against each other. Before Bhima could say anything, a raspy voice caught him off guard and stops him in his tracks to say that he must answer questions before he even thinks about indulging in the river. Bhima rushes over to his brothers Sahadeva and Arjuna to tell them that he heard a mysterious voice telling him that he must answer some questions in order to drink from the river. Of course, Sahadeva and Arjuna laugh at Bhima and tell him that he shouldn’t let his brother Nakula influence him. Bhima and Nakula were always the underdogs of the Pandavas. Compared to their brothers, they were seen as the outcasts. “I don’t have any energy to put into your stupid actions. I am too exhausted and thirsty to think about not drinking this water right now. If you want me to, we will all drink from the river together.” Nakula had no other option but to drink from the river. He knew that if he didn’t drink that water from the river that his body would soon shut down because of dehydration. But he also knew that in order for his brothers to stop taunting him he had to drink the water. So Nakula walked over to the river, placed his hands in the river, scooped out a handful of water and sipped it slowly. Before Nakula could finish the handful of water, he dies. His brothers thought that he was playing a trick on them and that he was pretending to be dead just to prove his brothers wrong. Sahadeva, Arjuna and Bhima all go and grab a spoonful of water in their hands. As soon as one drop of water hit their mouths, they all meet the same fate as Nakula. Yudhisthira skips all the way back to the river, after leaving his brothers to go and find food. As he approaches the river, he notices that there is a peculiar smell. At first he thought that it was game that he had just killed, but as he walk closer and closer to the river, he is stunned by all of his brothers lying died by the river. Yudhisthira drops to his knees and begins to weep. His sobs were interrupted by a distinct whisper. This whisper was telling him that he must answer some questions to change the fate of his brothers. Of course, Yudhisthira abides, one thing that he did not know was that this was all a test by the God of Death, Yama. Once Yudhisthira answered the questions, his brothers started to arise like zombies. The only difference was, his brothers didn’t even recognize him for they had received the gift of unrecognizability. 
(To Be Continued) 
Author's Note: 
Usually I continue with the series of my stories, week after week. But as I was reading, I noticed that if I continued with the dice game, that I would be stuck at the beginning of the book. So this week I decided to focus on the Pandavas, and their journey through the forest. I added a little bit of content to the story, but it is mainly original. This is the first time that I have kind of kept the story original. Every other time I usually add a twist or base it off of a movie.Hope that you enjoy the story this week!  

Bibliography: 
TitleThe Mahabharata: A Shortened Modern Prose Version of the Indian Epic  
Author: R. K. Narayan  
Year: 1978 

5 comments:

  1. Jordan, I honestly liked how you changed it up this week! I have enjoyed reading your “different episodes” each week. You have a real gift for storytelling and it shows! I especially loved the ending! The way that you described the Pandavas brothers arising like zombies was great. It gave me a great mental picture and really added more to the story than you would probably expect! Great job writing this week!

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  2. First of all I'd like to start with the fact that I liked your retelling of the story and I felt like you covered it very fully and well. However I would like to mention that it was a little hard to read. I don't know if you originally wrote it this way or it just displays like this, but there are not any paragraph spacings and all the parts of the story seem to kind of run together. However I did like how you retold the story and gave it more detail.

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  3. Hi Jordan! This was probably one of my favorite sections from the Mahabharata and I'm really glad you chose to write about it. I think your story was really well done and you did a good job of characterizing all of the brothers, even the twins who are fairly bland in the original. I know it can feel a bit strange to retell a story and not change much, but I think it really worked for this story.

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  4. Jordan, I loved this story. I could just imagine being starving and dehydrated and seeing images of water! I would doubt whether or not what I was seeing was real, too! The only thing I would say that needs some help is spelling/placement mistakes. Just some simple proofreading could fix these things (but I understand how much time it takes to reread everything over and over.)

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  5. I really liked this story. One thing I wish you had done was create paragraphs the lines started running together, but to be fair I am really tired. I like how you placed all the Pandava brothers in harm’s way at the same time, not one at a time which is the version I read. I think it is more realistic because what group of exiles travels separately?

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