(Sita, Rama and Lakshmana are walking back to Far Far Away and they are engaged in a conversation.)
"When I was a little girl, I was tossed away in the furrows in a ploughed field. Because I was found in the furrows, my adopted parents told me that my mother was Bhumi Devi, also known as the goddess of earth. It was then that I was adopted by King Janaka of Mithila and Queen Sunayna." Rama reached over to grab Sita's hand again. But he was hesitant.
He then said, "That doesn’t explain why or how you know who I am." The very next moment, Sita kissed Rama passionately and that very kiss knocked Rama off of his feet.
Sita gently put Rama’s face in her hands and whispered to him, "All I know is that I have been dreaming about you since I was a young girl. One thing that I am sure about is that you are the person that I want to marry."
As Rama focused his attention on Sita, he then asked her, "What is it that I have to do in order for you to be my wife?"
Sita started to explain to Rama that there were certain conditions prescribed by her father, the King, that had to be met before she could be married off. The conditions of the swayamwara were that Sita could only marry the person who would have the ability to string Pinaka, also known as the bow of the god Shiva.
Rama grew a grin on his face, for he knew that he had almighty strength and that this task would be an easy one. But he couldn’t help but notice that Sita had looked defeated after explaining everything to Rama. Sita then went on to say that Rama shouldn’t get his hopes up too much because no one had ever been able to lift the bow. Therefore, she would be single for the rest of her life. Rama decided to take on the challenge and asked Sita to take him and his brother to her kingdom so that he could complete the task, but more importantly so that he could face her father and ask for her hand in marriage.
He then said, "That doesn’t explain why or how you know who I am." The very next moment, Sita kissed Rama passionately and that very kiss knocked Rama off of his feet.
Sita gently put Rama’s face in her hands and whispered to him, "All I know is that I have been dreaming about you since I was a young girl. One thing that I am sure about is that you are the person that I want to marry."
As Rama focused his attention on Sita, he then asked her, "What is it that I have to do in order for you to be my wife?"
Sita started to explain to Rama that there were certain conditions prescribed by her father, the King, that had to be met before she could be married off. The conditions of the swayamwara were that Sita could only marry the person who would have the ability to string Pinaka, also known as the bow of the god Shiva.
Rama grew a grin on his face, for he knew that he had almighty strength and that this task would be an easy one. But he couldn’t help but notice that Sita had looked defeated after explaining everything to Rama. Sita then went on to say that Rama shouldn’t get his hopes up too much because no one had ever been able to lift the bow. Therefore, she would be single for the rest of her life. Rama decided to take on the challenge and asked Sita to take him and his brother to her kingdom so that he could complete the task, but more importantly so that he could face her father and ask for her hand in marriage.
*Remember that Sita was locked away in the tallest room of the tallest tower, and Rama and his brother were sent out to rescue her. Now that they have rescued Sita, they are on their way to her kingdom so that Rama can complete the task to marry Sita.*
Rama approached King Janaka, and introduced himself as Rama, son of Dasharatha. Sita's father was not too pleased to hear that Rama was the son of Dasharatha. Dasharatha was well known by all of the people of the kingdom for his gift of strength. Rama first asked the King for his daughter's hand in marriage, and of course King Janaka refused. King Janaka told Rama that the only way he would give his blessing for his daughter to go and marry him was if he could lift the bow of Shiva.
Rama laughed at the King, for in the back of his mind, he knew the king was not aware of his strength. Rama walked over to the bow, lifted the bow with one hand, fastened the strings on the bow, and amazed not only Sita, but her father and everyone that was watching. After Rama put the bow back down, King Janaka waved his hand as a sign of approval. Rama walked over to Sita and instantly dropped down to one knee.
He gently grabbed Sita's hand, rubbed his thumb across the base of her knuckles, looked up at her and simply asked her. “Would you do me the honor of being my wife?”
Rama laughed at the King, for in the back of his mind, he knew the king was not aware of his strength. Rama walked over to the bow, lifted the bow with one hand, fastened the strings on the bow, and amazed not only Sita, but her father and everyone that was watching. After Rama put the bow back down, King Janaka waved his hand as a sign of approval. Rama walked over to Sita and instantly dropped down to one knee.
He gently grabbed Sita's hand, rubbed his thumb across the base of her knuckles, looked up at her and simply asked her. “Would you do me the honor of being my wife?”
(To be continued)
Author's Note: This week, I wanted to focus more on Sita and Rama. I loved the story of Rama and Sita because it was a love story. From my previous story: Rama rescued Sita from the tallest room of the tallest tower. Sita and Rama finally introduced themselves to each other and become acquainted. As they held hands, they both got a glimpse of their past. Before Rama could say anything, Sita informed him that she had been dreaming about him since she was a little girl. What will happen tonight? Will Rama distance himself from Sita? Stay tuned to find out. I added a little twist to the story. I still tried to stay on my theme with the movie Shrek, but, it was a little hard to do so. This week the scene is from Shrek 2 when Fiona's dad did not approve of Shrek because he was an ogre, and Fiona’s dad needed her to kiss Prince Charming so that the curse could be broken. The story of rescuing the princess from the tallest room of the tallest tower alsom come from Shrek 2. There was one part of my story in which I added a little twist and that was when King Janaka didn’t like Rama. In the traditional story King Janaka actually likes Rama because he was fond of his family name and knows that Rama was able to take care of his daughter. I think I did a good job of adding a bit of suspense to the story by talking about Rama and the bow. In the end Rama passed the test. I added to the end of my story that Rama popped the question to Sita. So I hope you enjoyed the story this week and feel free to leave any comments!
Bibliography:
Title: Nine Ideal Indian Women
Author: Maharanee Sunity Devee
Year: 1919
Your way of storytelling is definitely different than any others that I've come across during this course. I was a little bit confused until I after I read your Author's Note explaining that it is supposed to mimic the story from Shrek. I thought it was interesting how the story plays out as if the reader is watching the events as they are occurring in front of them.
ReplyDeleteJordan, I think it is so funny that King Janaka didn’t really like Rama. Honestly, that makes sense! I pictured the king being overprotected when I read this passage in our reading assignment- why else would he come up with such a bogus requirement for the man who marries his daughter?? I also liked the transitions you used between portions of the story and to set up the introduction. Well done!
ReplyDeleteThis was an interesting take on the story of Rama and the bow. Using the story of Shrek was an interesting choice. The princess that the needed to be rescued element fit into the story well. One part of the story that bothered me was how the information was given that Sita was trapped in a tower. For the method used, it seemed like it would fit better at the beginning of the story. Use it like a setting of the scene or something. One way I think that would have fit your writing would be to sneak it into the story. Use a conversation or in a plot update. The relationship between Sita and Rama felt realistic. It did not feel as if the whole relationship was a fairytale and that it could possibly happen. A final note is that the story flowed well and at the same time, the story was full of details.
ReplyDeleteI really appreciated how you used dialogue at the beginning of the story. However, I felt like your portrayal of Sita makes her seem one dimensional. Sita says that she dreamt about Rama since she was little and she wants to marry him. This makes her seem shallow. The original story similarly has a "love at first sight concept," but I think there is a lot of room to add character complexity here. Try to develop the characters and their relationships a little more. Later, you have to an aside about how Sita was trapped in the tallest tower where Rama had to rescue her. Did you write a previous story about this? I had not heard that before. Also, in the aside, "the" should be "they." I noticed near the end that you keep switching tenses. Just make sure your tenses stay constant. I look forward to reading some of your other stories.
ReplyDeleteI really appreciated how you used dialogue at the beginning of the story. However, I felt like your portrayal of Sita makes her seem one dimensional. Sita says that she dreamt about Rama since she was little and she wants to marry him. This makes her seem shallow. The original story similarly has a "love at first sight concept," but I think there is a lot of room to add character complexity here. Try to develop the characters and their relationships a little more. Later, you have to an aside about how Sita was trapped in the tallest tower where Rama had to rescue her. Did you write a previous story about this? I had not heard that before. Also, in the aside, "the" should be "they." I noticed near the end that you keep switching tenses. Just make sure your tenses stay constant. I look forward to reading some of your other stories.
ReplyDeleteThis was a very cleanly written and neatly organized story. I love the way you used a combination of side notes for the readers to keep in mind along with inserted character dialogue throughout the telling of the story. Sometimes when stories are written this way the writing comes out less clean and is a little messier to follow but you did a good job of avoiding that throughout the whole story. Also, the way you wrote Rama's part made him come off as very confident and attractive as a main character so that adds to the effect of the story for the reader as well. I like that you changed the part about Sita and Rama meeting to make it your own and different from the Ramayana. It seems more romantic for Sita to have been dreaming about Rama ever since she was a little girl as opposed to falling in love simply by first sight.
ReplyDeleteHey Jordan!
ReplyDeleteI really enjoyed your story. I felt like it was a fairy tale. I did not notice any grammar or punctuation error. Your story was clear and concise. Your paragraphs were not too long or too wordy. The only suggestion that I have is that I kind of wished that you would have further described the image you included. I could not really make out what was happening in the picture. Is that Sita sitting? Is she being crowned by her father? Is Rama included in the picture?
Another thing that I liked about your story was how detailed it was. I felt like I understood what Sita and Rama were going through. I liked how we got have a little insight of Rama. At first he was reluctant, like any other actual man, but then he eventually gave in and fell in love with Sita. It was like a cute modern romantic comedy.
Jordan, I really enjoyed your story. I love exploring romance and I think you did a beautiful job with it. I instantly saw your your Shrek theme shine through. I really like that you combined the two stories so elegantly. I'm glad that the story was on a white background, if it were on a black background like the comments I wouldn't enjoy this so much. I think you did a good job developing your characters, they had a lot of depth to them. I liked your picture although I didn't love the placement of it. I think it would have been great to add another picture in the middle of the story that fit in with your theme better. I liked that your story was centered and the font size was appropriate. I also really enjoyed reading your authors note you did a great job explaining your story in it.
ReplyDeleteThis was so much different than the other stories I've read about Sita and Rama. Your storytelling technique is very interesting. At first, I thought the story was going to be in first person, but I like how you used dialogue in this story. It made it very personal and I enjoyed that. I love that you are using Shrek as an inspiration for your story! It definitely makes it more creative and interesting. Your writing style sounds very traditional and fairytale like. It's perfect for this story and for your Shrek theme. This is very interesting, good job! I also like how detailed your author's note is. It really helped center the story and add information that helped me understand it more. Your story is not hard to understand, it's just that the author's note helped me pick up on some of the smaller details. I also like your blog style. The picture in the background is very cool, but it does not make the text hard to read. Well done!
ReplyDeleteHey Jordan! Okay, at first I was a little confused as to what was going on because of the difference in the stories I read however, as I read more I realized where and when the story was taking place. I like that in your story Sita and Rama really get to meet before he takes her in marriage because otherwise it would be like every other story where they are married after only having seen each other from a distance.
ReplyDeleteOne thing I did notice was the little added tidbit that you threw in there about the story that it was continued from. Honestly the place where you threw it in really confused me because I hadn't read the story that had come before and I think that it would have been better either at the very beginning, or in the author's note. However overall I liked this version of the story of Rama and Sita!
Jordan! You are the first portfolio that I have read for this class and so far, it is amazing. I love your website background because it so expertly sets the mood for a Indian Epics Portfolio. Your colors and font choices complement the overall look beautifully. It is a little strange to see your main body of text on the right side of the page as opposed to the left. It made me feel as if I was working a little bit harder to read the story. However, that is just a minor thing and really a matter of personal preference.
ReplyDeleteThis story is amazing. I like how you had an idea that you were pulling from for the story. However, you did it in such a way that it was not as obvious and I really liked that. It was obviously something you wrote in your own words. Good job!
Hi Jordan! I really enjoyed reading your story that focused on Rama and Sita's love from this week! It was a super cute and romantic story with a very well written twist! From the way Rama and Sita met, their initial kiss, and to the way Rama fought for Sita’s hand in marriage and then continued to ask her to marry him- it was all a great romantic story! I really enjoyed it because of the fairytale feel. I especially liked how you incorporated the plot from Shrek and Fiona's love story into Rama and Sita's love story as well. The dialogue really helped improve the love story as well. The story was very organized and well written, overall, with just a few grammatical errors. The author’s note was very detailed. Good job, keep up the work!
ReplyDelete